Trauma Awareness and Treatment Center

Trauma From Domestic Violence and Domestic Violence Related Child Abuse.

As has been noted, trauma comes from several sources and events. Domestic abuse and violence  (DV) are  unfortunate common situations that occur in many homes. Domestic violence occurs when two people who are cohabitants or have been cohabitants have one or more incidents in which abuse or violence occurs. The cohabitants must be over 18 years of age. If younger, it is considered child abuse. In a relationship where DV is present, there is an abuser and a victim. The abuser uses tactics and behaviors to control and manipulate the relationship and the victim. Some of these tactics are subtle (e.g. Controlling what the victim wears and how they talk), and some are aggressive and violent (e.g. Physical violence and coercion). The goal of the abuser is to create an environment and relationship in which he/she has control and power. The relationship does not normally start abusive. The abuser is usually kind, loving, and accommodating (honeymoon phase). As the relationship progresses, the abuser can begin to seem jealous of the victim. Some jealousy behaviors include manipulative actions such as saying, “I just couldn’t stand being alone tonight while you were out with friends. I was lonely and worried about you. I just can’t be without you, because I love you so much…” As tension escalates with the abuser, the tactics become more aggressive (e.g. Refuse to let the victim see friends or family members. Limit how much time the victim can spend with others or how much money they can have). At this point the abuser may begin to come across as threatening or aggressive. At ofttimes he/she will be apologetic for a time and return to prior aggressiveness. The danger is that aggressive tactics change from verbal threats to actual carried out physical events such as breaking objects, refusing phone use, pushing, hitting, etc. Such a relationship can be debilitating to the victim and can oftentimes lead to PTSD, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, isolation, severe physical trauma, and others.

When children witness domestic violence, they are exposed to an environment where abuse is exploited and acceptable. In the State of Utah, when a child is a witness of or has knowledge of domestic violence, it is called Domestic Violence Related Child Abuse. Children can begin to change their thinking and behavioral repertoire in order to make the abuse and violence acceptable to them. At times, it can perpetuate the cycle of abuse leading to an increase in abusers and victims. Exposure to domestic violence can lead to adjustment disorders, PTSD, anxiety, depression, and other disorders that affect a child’s day-to-day living and emotional development.